For the first time since 2008, we will have all of our children and grandchildren under the same roof at the same time. What a wonderful gift for Christmas! Even as I type "all of our children", I am acutely aware that Trey will not be here with us physically. He will always be here in our hearts. Funny thoughts come to mind: no one will be disappointed because Trey drew their names-he was sort of a cheap gift giver. OR when he wasn't, he was certain to point out the dollar value so you'd know he spent a lot! No one will be talking like a pirate, a sure sign Trey had had too much Christmas spirit!
The nieces and nephews who have been born since Trey died will never know his sense of humor or zest for fun. I see traces of him and Trinity in Caden. Gannen and Laiton are the only ones who remember Trey, other than stories from their parents.
How am I now? Much better that the searing pain has for the most part subsided. I miss Trey terribly and wish that I could talk to him or hear his goofy laugh. I long to hear him say that the best gift he could give me is his presence! I cherish the memories of him, good and bad, and am satisfied that at last, he is at peace with himself and has self value.
All I want for Christmas is my family in the same place under one roof, overflowing our home with love and laughter.